prison breack game

Blow Out

S04E06

• Name: Blow Out
• Air Date: September 29th, 2008
• Season: 4
• Number: 06

Episode Outline

I just discovered some strange time-shifting channel that airs Prison Break a full two hours before Fox does. Time-shifting truly is one of man's greatest inventions.

We open with Sara riding up an elevator. And, hello, cleavage! She's dressed in some jeans and this weird printed tank top. Michael, on the other hand, is wearing the Evil Hat that Wants to Take Over the Show (or, "Evil Hat" for short, because even the acronym is too long). He stares appreciatively at Sara's cleavage while she admonishes him. And, oh yeah, they're at a race track. Michael crosses back with Linc (who is wearing a hat that looks about two sizes too small but is, thankfully, a normal baseball cap), hangs him something and says "Gate 8". Do you all think that I'm unnaturally obsessed with the hats on this show?

Mahone, who we quickly learn is the one man in the group not wearing a hat (at least Sucre is wearing a cool Panama hat) joins Michael and the two of them see Sara and Bellick placing bets. While Bellick gets all ornery and loud with the ticket seller, Sucre lures away a securing guard so Linc can enter the area where the horses and their jockeys are. Sara manages to distract another security guard so that Michael and Mahone can sneak into an "employees only" section. We see Linc by the track with a little transmitter device.

Michael hides the Black Hole device under the desk of the Operations Manager and the boys hightail it out of there. We see that Scylla cardholder #4 is at the track with his wife. As people gather outside to watch the race I lament the fact that not even a man as attractive as Wentworth Miller can make that hat work. That just goes to show you that there are some items that are so ugly they're nearly unspeakable. Meanwhile, Sara, Bellick and Mahone are all watching the race on monitors inside.

We see that the device Lincoln had messed with the gate of the horse that cardholder #4 bet on (let's call him Racetrack Guy). He's super pissed and storms off to bitch to the manager.

We see Racetrack Guy storm into the Operations Manager's office. Ah, all the better to steal his Scylla information. The Operation Manager gets called away because of the device used to stall the gate and Racetrack Guy goes with him, but not before the Black Hole copied all of the Scylla data.

Some guys start a fight and Mahone sends Michael off in case he gets recognized. Sara, meanwhile, tries to chat up a security guard using a fake Southern accent. He calls her "sweetheart". Sweetheart? Could you get any more condescending, asshole? Mahone retrieves the Black Hole from the office while the guard calls Sara "honey". I totally want to slap that jerk.

Unfortunately, the security guards find Mahone in the hallway near the office and arrest him. Probably because he punched one of them. Unfortunately, he didn't punch the asshole guard. The rest of the gang sees him being put in a police cruiser.

Now we're in Riverside, California, where Gretchen is knocking on her sister's door.

At GATE, T-Bag is discovering more clues in Whistler's bird book by holding it up to the light. Another employee (Andy) enters, telling T-Bag they have a issue. Could the fact that T-Bag is still gainfully employed yet appears to do no work whatsoever be the "issue"? T-Bag starts spewing some salesman nonsense and Andy leaves.

Mahone arrives at the police station where we see he has given a face name to the police. The sergeant dumps his personal effects on the desk and starts going through them. Mahone tries reasoning with the sergeant to let him off, but the sergeant doesn't wanna.

Linc is talking to Self on the phone, explaining what happened to Mahone. Linc demands that Self get Mahone off, while Self protests. When he reenters his office, Self sees some IT guy working on his computer without authorization. Self demands that he leave. I'm thinking this IT guy was sent by Pad Man.

Linc returns to HQ and tries to convince the group that Self will get Mahone out. Sara starts briefing the group on what they know about the next cardholder (who's name is Howard Scuderi): he owns an agricultural conglomerate which is profiting off of the food inflation in Laos.

Gretchen's taking a shower in her sister's bathroom. When she inspects her injuries she starts to cry. Oh, I'm sorry, am I supposed to feel sorry for the bitch?

She goes down to the kitchen, where her sister is reading with her daughter. Gretchen lies about what happened and asks to see the owl she sent her sister from Germany. It's ugly, so she breaks it. Ok, not really. But she does smash it to reveal a gun inside. As her sister gets freaked out, Gretchen says she's now an independent contractor..

Wyatt is briefing Pad Man on Self's background when the IT guy enters. The IT guy admits that he can't get past Self's computer firewalls to access his personal information.

Mahone's stewing in jail when he sees that Self is trying to get him out. The sergeant is getting lippy while Self starts throwing around some federal authority. Self asks Mahone to sign a paper to release his personal effects, including the Black Hole. Mahone is reluctant (he wants out of jail) but eventually agrees and Self leaves him there.

Linc updates the team back at HQ: Self has the Black Hole, but Mahone's in prison. Linc says he feels bad but they can't sacrifice the mission just to save Mahone. Sucre is a bit pissed, particularly when Linc says that if Sucre got arrested they would leave him behind too. Bastard! Michael doesn't immediately jump to Sucre's rescue, but I'm certain he wouldn't leave his old cellmate behind.

Despite some protestations from various members of the group Michael finally agrees with Linc. Sucre looks horribly betrayed and disgusted.

In the parking garage of the federal building, Wyatt and Self come face to face. We learn Pad Man's name (General Krantz) when Wyatt says that he works for the General and asks why Self is snooping around. Self is practically peeing himself trying to come up with lame excuses for his snooping. Wyatt warns Self to butt out. Then he says "that's all" in a manner so akin to Meryl Streep in The Devil Wears Prada that it's actually a little creepy. While Self walks away, Wyatt sees a parking ticket on Self's dash from the police station.

Self is telling Michael about Wyatt. Self offers to have Mahone killed in case he shoots his mouth off. Dude, seriously! It's Mahone! You cannot do that.

The sergeant is talking to Mahone, offering to drop the charges. But only if he can identify his "accomplice" at the racetrack: Michael.

The group is taking a meeting, trying to decide how to get to the fifth cardholder: Scuderi. Unfortunately, Scuderi has a state of the art alarm system. Michael starts whining about how hard it will be to breach it. Um....did they not just breach a state of the art alarm system back in episode 2? Michael suggests that they overload the power to the alarm system so that it'll shut itself off.

Bellick interjects: he wants to know what will happen if the cops get him. Roland worries that Mahone will squeal about the team. Michael says they have no way of knowing what Mahone will do and they have no real options; they can't break him out of the police station. Seriously? Seriously?! Did they not break out of a maximum security prison? But somehow they can't break Mahone out of some junior jail?

T-Bag's in his office, trying to figure out the clues in the bird book. He enters a closet while Trishanne looks on suspiciously.

Linc's back at HQ with some jumper cables. Michael tells Sara that they're going to leave Mahone in jail, but Michael feels guilty if The Company gets to him.

Speaking of The Company getting to Alex, Wyatt has entered the police station where he's being held. He sees that Self signed in to see Mahone and asks to see Mahone, but the sergeant denies him access. Mahone recognizes Wyatt and hides while Wyatt asks for the name of the courthouse where Mahone will be arraigned.

Mahone calls Michael from jail to deliver news of Wyatt. Mahone promises not to rat them and asks Michael to kill Wyatt. Michael agrees.

Gretchen's on the phone, speaking to someone about her "dead husband". Her sister wants answers, but Gretchen dismisses her. We quickly learn that Gretchen is the mother of her sister's daughter (Emily) but gave her sister custody. She kisses the girl and leaves. Again, considering the choices she's made, am I supposed to feel sorry for the bitch?

Michael and Linc start fiddling with the power to the alarm system. Self is listening to his voicemail messages and we learn he has a wife. Self pulls up the map of the location of the boys and sees that they're near Mahone. Ah ha! So Michael isn't fiddling with the alarm system! He's going to break Mahone out of police custody.

Mahone is being escorted into the courtroom and sees Wyatt enter. The two clearly recognize each other and there's some tense music in the background alerting us to the fact that this is a tense moment.

T-Bag's trying to figure out if something is hidden in the closet when Andy comes in to expose him. Apparently he thinks T-Bag is defrauding GATE. T-Bag quickly wipes his prints off of his office supplies and runs out of the building.

Gretchen is meeting with a police officer or a corner or something. We see that she is trying to claim Whistler's personal belongings by claiming he's her husband. She doesn't have a marriage certificate so she just punches the guy out. Gretchen goes through the filing cabinet and sees that Whistler's phone has a voicemail message: his one-bedroom apartment is ready.

Sara's playing lawyer and walks into the courtroom wearing a suit and a weird hairstyle. She asks the DA for Mahone's file and we see Sucre in the back on a phone. He begins a countdown as Wyatt approaches Mahone. Michael pulls the switch and the lights don't just go off in the courthouse, they explode. We quickly see that Sucre has retrieved Mahone and they have disappeared. Wyatt is super pissed.

Sucre and Mahone are fleeing the building as Wyatt gives chase. The boys quickly get into the getaway car and leave with Wyatt still in pursuit. Unfortunately, his plan to shoot everything in sight is stopped by the arrival of the police.

Back at HQ, Mahone thanks everyone for getting him out. Mahone sneaks out to call Wyatt. He offers to meet up with Wyatt, but Wyatt wants more. He wonders why Sara and Mahone are both in LA. Mahone doesn't care much for this tangent, he only wants to deal with Wyatt. Unfortunately, Mahone hangs up before they can make a deal to meet. When he reenters HQ he throws out the paper with Wyatt's number on it, which Roland picks up from the garbage can. Christ, Roland, you are seriously going to get yourself killed.

T-Bag, meanwhile, is trying to dust his prints from his pretty apartment when Gretchen storms in and kicks him to the ground. Pointing a gun at his head she asks "who are you?" And I'm assuming that this is how the two pair up together for some joint dastardly deeds.

Well, since I discovered time-shifting but my family members have not, I have no opinion from my grandfather or cousin this week. We'll have to catch up with them later. See you all back here next week.

Safe and Sound S04E04

S04E05

• Name: Safe and Sound
• Air Date: September 22nd, 2008
• Season: 4
• Number: 05

Episode Outline

I have a confession to make. Last night, for the third time in my 28 years, I saw New Kids on the Block in concert. On the one hand, there's my embarrassment. I mean, next year I'm going to be 30. What in the hell was I doing trying to relive my early teenage years? On the other hand, none of that matters because it was totally f**cking AWESOME. My favorite part was Jordan Knight, with the unbuttoned white shirt, and his gorgeous abs, and the wind machine. As my friend Melodie breathlessly declared: "God bless the man that made the wind machine".

But I digress... Last time on Prison Break, the previous episodes happened. We open where we left off: Sara is walking back to HQ and is being followed by Wyatt. Can someone please explain to me why Sara can't buy a normal purse? One with pockets and compartments instead of those soft, cloth, shapeless purses that she seems to favor. That would drive me crazy. I would never be able to find my keys in her purse. She notices that Bruce's credit card is missing. She also notices that she's being followed (Wyatt cleverly ducks behind a car to hide).

Back at HQ, Michael asks Self to get the FBI tech guys to help them identify the people he filmed on his cell phone. Self immediately recognizes that one of them works in his building. How awkward. I can only imagine that conversation around the water cooler on Monday morning. That guy is the head of the Treasury in LA. Michael hands Self the Black Hole device and suggests he make up something to get close to Treasury Guy (aka, the next Scylla cardholder), but Self protests. Because lying about government stuff can net you five years in prison. Shit! Did someone warn George Bush?!

I suspect that Self is going to end up on the run like everyone else on this show before the season is through.

Mahone's sitting in a diner, meeting with his ex-wife, Pam. She's very short with him and identifies Wyatt from some photos as their son's killer. Damnit, Mahone! You're breaking my heart again! This is, like, the seventh episode that you've done that. She tries to comfort him, while also encouraging him to find and kill Wyatt. She hands him something in an envelope.

Sara starts running as Wyatt continues to chase her. Fortunately, with some quick thinking, and some weaving through traffic, she manages to evade him.

At his shiny new job at GATE, T-Bag notices that spilling tea on the bird book reveals some secret code. With some more dabbing, he reveals a ladder written in ink.

Back at HQ Sucre and Linc are arguing. Sucre wants to track down T-Bag, but Linc wants them to lay low. Michael orders Bellick and Sucre to search the buildings where they last saw T-Bag.

Self barges into Treasury Guy's office, spinning some tall tale. Back at HQ, Roland and Michael are watching the signal from the Black Hole. We quickly discover that the Scylla card is in Treasury Guy's safe. He quickly dismisses Self, but not before revealing that he's headed oversees soon.

Self and Michael quickly realize where the card is located. Michael asks Self to bring him the blueprints. Self protests. Self, seriously, did you even see Season 1? Michael crafted an elaborate plan to break out of prison based solely on the blueprints. Come on, man! Keep up!

Sara arrives back at HQ and tells the boys that she was followed. She identifies Wyatt from a picture that Mahone is holding. He announces that Wyatt killed his son.

Mahone's asking Sara for help to find Wyatt. She tells Mahone that Bruce's credit card is missing.

Michael, Self and Lincoln are pouring over the blueprints, trying to come up with a way to get inside the federal building. Michael comes up with a plan in about 26 seconds (a new record!) and Self draws the insignia that was on the safe.

Wyatt's visiting with Gretchen. Gretchen's not doing so good (yeay!), yet she still manages to insult Sara and her escaping skills. Wyatt puts a bucket of something rotten in front of Gretchen and she starts gagging. When he leaves, she continues to jimmy the screw free.

Michael announces that only the Treasury Guy's fingerprint will open the safe. Linc, who apparently robbed safes in a former life, suggests many options, all of which Michael shoots down. Self is being a Negative Nancy, insisting there is no way the boys can get into the office. Considering it's his ass on the line too, you think he'd be more helpful. Michael's wearing a little grin that says "dude, I'm the smartest thing in a 50-mile radius and I'm going to find a way into that safe".

Roland is helping Mahone track down information about Bruce's credit card and Wyatt's whereabouts. Along with Sara, they're trying to figure out where Wyatt is staying.

Back at GATE, T-Bag is asking for more tea when he sees Bellick and Sucre at reception. They're spinning some story that T-Bag just inherited a bunch of money and they're looking to give it to him, but the receptionist, Trishanne, denies knowing him.

Michael's playing with an etch-a-sketch and working on a science project. Self gets a call and promises to keep Treasury Guy's adjoining officemate out of his office. Michael calls Sucre and Bellick and asks them to meet him.

Self drives the boys into the parking garage of the federal building, where Linc walks out in a suit. Oh yeah, baby! Where's a damn wind machine when you need one?!

Linc, Bellick, Sucre and Michael are in the elevator, fiddling with the controls, heading up to the 10th floor.

Back at GATE, Trishanne is again displaying her inappropriate office cleavage. She blackmails T-Bag: in exchange for keeping quiet about his whereabouts, she wants more than the $10,000 Sucre offered. She eventually settles for 3% of his commission.

Self takes out Treasury Guy's next door officemate for lunch. Before they leave, he squirts something on the carpet outside the office. In the storage room, an employee encounters Bellick and Sucre fiddling with the vents. Up in the vents, Lincoln sees that Michael's nose is bleeding. Finally! Maybe we'll finally learn what's going on.

Back at HQ, Roland's handing Mahone a list of possible hotels that Wyatt may be staying.

At the federal building, Sucre and Bellick, posing as janitors, find the mess that Self left behind. They go into the guy's office, while Michael and Linc come down from the vent. They start to break into Treasury Guy's safe from the other side of the wall.

Outside the office, Sucre and Bellick are covering up the sound of Linc and Michael's actions by cleaning up the mess Self made with a vacuum.

Inside the office, Linc is asking Michael how long he's had the nosebleeds. Linc mentions that it was a big deal when Michael was 13, but Michael insists that Linc not tell Sara. He says he's just "acclimating to the warmer climate" and brushes Linc off. Damnit, writers, just tell me what's wrong with Michael! Tell me what's wrong so I can love him back to health.

Back at HQ, Roland and Sara are staring at the pictures of the cardholders. Sara realizes that Lisa (last week's cardholder) recently headed to Laos, while Treasury Guy is also heading to Asia.

Mahone arrives at the bar Sara hung out at last week. He pretends to be an investigator and shows the bartender lady a picture of Wyatt. She gives him a short description of Wyatt's car.

At a motel, Wyatt is bribing the desk clerk for information? Something.

Back at the federal building, the secretary is trying to get Sucre and Bellick to stop the noise. Sucre retrieves a stack of letters inside the office for her and the boys resume their work.

Pad Man arrives at an office, asking for someone named Griffin. The assistant offers to get him.

Michel hears that someone has entered Treasury Guy's office. Oh yes, it's Pad Man. Ok, Treasury Guy is named Griffin.

Michael and Linc are scrambling for a new plan: a way to get into the safe quietly.

Mahone, meanwhile, pulls up to a motel. We see that Pam gave him a gun the last time she saw him. Mahone approaches the same desk clerk Wyatt was speaking to before. The desk clerk identifies Wyatt from a photo, but says he checked out. Mahone asks for a key to the room. When Mahone leaves the office, the desk clerk calls Wyatt. Before the desk clerk can deliver the news, Mahone points a gun at him. The desk clerk hands over the note with Wyatt's phone number.

The Treasury Guy greets Pad Man in his office. We learn that Treasury Guy is also headed to Laos, while the boys finally break into the safe with minimal noise. Michael pulls out the Scylla card and they call Roland. Sara is watching a news report on her PDA, which says that Laos is suffering from inflation and food riots. Plus, 200 people are dead. Michael is taking a picture of both sides of Scylla, while listening to Pad Man and Treasury Guy's conversation. Pad Man is telling Treasury Guy that there's some funny business going on.

Pad Man insists that Treasury Guy take out Scylla from his safe. There's some tense moments while Treasury Guy is slowly opening his safe and the boys are still copying the information. Pad Man insists that all of the cardholders keep their cards on them. The boys quickly pack up and leave just as Self returns from lunch.

Back at HQ, Sara is telling Michael what she learned about Laos. She thinks the cardholders are trying to tear Laos down and Michal thinks they're going to do so to turn a profit by rebuilding it. She tells him about the bar, but insists she can handle this.

Back at GATE, Trishanne escorts Mr. Xing's killer into T-Bag's office. He takes out a gun and tells T-Bag he was supposed to deliver "the item" two days ago. Mr. Xing's killer demands to know where Scylla is, but T-Bag tries to stall. When the killer threatens his life, T-Bag agrees to deliver. And this is how T-Bag starts working with Michael again, I'm sure. Trishanne looks at the phone number Bellick left her.

Back in Gretchen's cell, she quickly strangles the guard who enters. No, I'm sorry, she stabbed him in the head with the nail. Ew. Gross. She then frees herself with his keys and escapes.

Self is talking to Michael. They have identified the names and addresses of two of the remaining card holders, except for the general, aka Pad Man. Sara tells Michael that when she was being held captive, she heard Gretchen taking orders from Pad Man. She thinks he's in charge of The Company.

Wyatt is telling Pad Man about Gretchen's escape when one of his assistants announces that Self has been searching for images about Pad Man.

Unfortunately, my father is in town and stopped by my grandparent's house, thereby preventing my grandfather from watching the show yet. My dad screws up everything. If he didn't hand me money this morning, I'd be super pissed at him. But he did, so I'll forgive him. Cousin Joe also missed the show since he just arrived home. Sheesh, no one in my family is as dedicated to this show as I am. I definitely need to get a new family.

See you all here next week. Same bat time, same bat channel.

Eagles and Angels S04E04

S04E04

• Name: Eagles and Angels
• Air Date: September 15th, 2008
• Season: 4
• Number: 04

Episode Outline

Previously on Prison Break we were introduced to Scylla and the ugliest hats in the world continued their quest to take over the show. Fortunately, they only put Mahone under their evil spell. Unfortunately, I've seen promo photos from later episodes and I know that the evil hats spread their ugliness to other members of the cast.

Michael finds Sara sitting by the water. He tells her that the photos from the Scylla team meeting are still printing. Because Michael took the video with a crappy cell phone....as opposed to the awesome new BlackBerry Pearl I just got last week....the images of the meeting are grainy. You should have gotten a CrackBerry, Michael. I already love it more than I love my own sister. Sorry, Jen, but you don't even read my recaps and the CrackBerry is there for me all the time. Anyways, Michael asks Sara if she's ever been on a yacht (well, what passes for a yacht in LA, which is pretty small) and she says she has. He, unfortunately, has not. Because despite his brains and all those suits, he actually grew up on the wrong side of the track. Then he says something about how the ocean is Sara's front yard, but his voice goes up as he says it and he waves his hand around. It's so weird and out of character that I wonder if this is another of Michael's "tumor" symptoms manifesting itself. Sucre interrupts their plans for the future.

Linc shows the group a picture of a license plate they got from the video. The team stares at the fuzzy letters before Sara and Michael realize there's a flag sticker on the plate and it's a diplomatic plate. Bellick wants to know about the break-in that's clearly going to happen later in the season (during sweeps, perhaps?), but Michael assures him that Agent Self will provide information for that. And that the whole break-in is useless without the cards. Pay attention, Bellick. Turns out the flag on the plate is from Turkey and the gang's headed over to the Turkish consulate. Sara elects to stay behind and work on the video.

Elsewhere in LA, T-Bag's suffering from first-day-at-work jitters. Maybe he's afraid the other people on the team won't invite him to sit with them at lunch.

The boys are outside the Turkish consulate. Fun story: I went to law school with the son of the Prime Minister of Belize. Great guy. Google now tells me that he's the leader of a political party. At the consulate, the boys see the car from the video. Roland calls to say that his little gadget from episode 2 (let's call it The Black Hole) is copying data from the card. Some lady gets out of the car, kisses the man goodbye and walks away. Roland announces they lost the signal to the card. I quickly guess that the woman actually has the card about two minutes before the guys do. The boy quickly drive off before they get recognized.

Back at HQ, Roland starts talking to Bellick. He tries to bond with Bellick, but he's having none of it. Self calls Sara and delivers the news that Bruce has been found dead.

Lisa, the lady cardholder, walks into Pad Man's office. I think I know this actress from somewhere. I know! She's from season 1 of seaQuest. For those of you who don't recall, that was a show about some soldiers and scientists in the future who lived on a huge submarine. Roy Scheider was on it. God, I totally loved that show when I was a kid. Anyway, Pad Man tells her the kip is currently at 10 and when it reaches 15 she'll have to leave. He talks to her about some sort of event she's attending that evening. She kisses him on the cheek and he tells her to stay safe.

The boys are sitting around a table when Lisa comes out of a nearby building. They quickly realize that she's got private security. Then Linc spots T-Bag across the courtyard. He looks shocked. I suspect, like me, he wonders why T-Bag has chosen to wear a porn mustache straight out of 1976. The boys run to chase T-Bag after he starts to run away.

Michael sure runs fast for a guy that lost two toes a few months ago. Linc greets T-Bag by slamming him against the wall. Standard Lincoln greeting. Michael asks why he's in LA and T-Bag says he's in town for some good old-fashioned revenge. Michael wants the bird book, but a cop starts looking at the trio suspiciously and the brothers take off.

Wyatt's in a hotel room, trying to locate Sara. He calls Pad Man and gives him an update. Pad Man is convinced that Gretchen knows something and she should stay alive until she talks. Pad Man has a job for Wyatt: find a former Company employee who's asking questions about Scylla.

The boys return to HQ and tell Bellick that T-Bag's in town. Michael goes to find Sara at her boat. She's upset that Bruce is dead and blames herself. Michael assures her that it isn't her fault. He's right Sara, it's all his fault. And he'll continue blaming himself for the rest of the show. Michael's a lot like Angel (from Buffy). He's all about the guilt and the sacrifice.

T-Bag arrives at GATE. He charms the receptionist (who is displaying her cleavage for the entire office). She announces that the boss, Mr. White, is running late. She tells him that Mr. Xing has already left two messages. Oh, Teddy, you're getting in deep with this, aren't you? He notices that Mr. Xing's phone number was already in Whistler's bird book.

Michael calls Self about Bruce's death. Self wants to know if Bruce knows Michael's location. They go back and forth before Michael announces that T-Bag is in town with Whistler's bird book. Self, who may have heard rumors about T-Bag's horrendous mustache, seems worried that he's in town. He leaves a message for that Company contact he met back in episode 2: the guy who was supposed to get information on The Company's HQ. You know, the guy that Pad Man ordered Wyatt to find.

Mahone announces that Lisa is the wife of the Turkish Consul. Roland announces that she's being honored at a charity party that night for a group called "Eagles and Angels" (and we have our title!). Mahone announces that the party is for the Association of Law Enforcement. In other words: cops.

The former employee (Jason?) calls Self. He's all worried because he thinks his phone is being tapped. Self announces he's on his way. He should be worried, because Wyatt's closing in.

The boys are playing with magnets and are leaving to go thieving. Michael leaves Sara behind.

At GATE, Mr. White announces T-Bag to his mentor, Andy, and then leaves for San Francisco. Andy shows T-Bag to his office and seems a bit suspicious. T-Bag notices that his office number was also marked in Whistler's bird book.

Sara's brooding about Bruce back at HQ. She grabs her bag and heads out to a bar. Oh, Sara. We always end up back here whenever you're upset. Back in season 1 it led to an overdose. She starts chatting with the bartender, asking all sorts of existential questions. I prefer to get existential with cabbies when I'm drinking. They're always fun. Sara asks for bourbon, but doesn't drink it.

Self arrives at Jason's apartment. Correction, Jason's former apartment. Because Jason is dead.

Linc, Michael and Sucre are engaging in a little B&E. Sucre's wearing a wife beater and I'm drooling. He's cute. Linc screws up the security camera with the magnets. You want to know their clever plan for getting in to the building? They literally take the door off its hinges. I hate when Michael spends entire seasons executing a hugely complex plan only to see them accomplish something like this so easily. We quickly learn that the boys went to steal some cop uniforms.

Our next shot is Michael, Linc and Sucre in the uniforms. Mmmmm, I love me some boys in blue.

Mahone joins the other boys, who mingle around the party. They spot Lisa. Michael quickly finds her table and slips The Black Hole underneath it. Michael calls Sara, but she's telling the bartender about Bruce. A creepy bar guy is trying to hit on her. I hate creepy guys at bars. He walks away and steals her credit card. Well, Bruce's credit card. Sara continues to tell the lady bartender about some story when she was 12. Then she starts crying.

At the benefit, a cop is giving a speech. Mahone flashes back to a picture of his son, while Michael remembers his father's grave. A security guard from the consulate recognizes Linc, so he leaves. Michael calls Roland, who says The Black Hole is copying the card.

Pad Man calls Lisa and says the kip is at 15. It's clearly some sort of signal. Linc is being followed by the guy from the consulate. Lisa gives her regrets and goes to leave, thereby cutting off the signal. Linc calls Sucre and Bellick and asks them to pick him up out back. Before he reaches the car he's intercepted by the consulate guy, who greets him by name.

The consulate guy has Lincoln at gunpoint but his calls over the radio go unanswered. Michael and Mahone move to get the card. Bellick saves Linc by stabbing the consulate guy, but in a non-fatal way. That is quickly remedied by Linc, who kills him dead. Linc is racking up quite the body count isn't he? Bellick is suitably freaked out. Linc calls Michael and tells him what he did. Michael wants Linc to let the others from The Company find the dead guy's body.

Wyatt greets Gretchen in her cell. She is having a REALLY bad hair day. Wyatt asks if she knows anything about Scylla, but she says she doesn't. He accuses her of lying, but she protests her innocence. My, my, how the tables have turned, Gretchen. Wyatt gets a call: someone just used Bruce's credit card. And off he goes. But not before we see that Gretchen is trying to get a screw out of some wood. Presumably to get her cuffs off and break out. Too bad she didn't learn the fine art of breaking out at the feet of Scofield.

At the charity event, Mahone approaches one of Lisa's guards. He says he believes of their guards is dead outside. Mahone takes the guard outside while Michael remains behind with Lisa. The Black Hole picks up the signal again and is copying the data card. Lisa is chatting with Michael and she tells him his nose is bleeding.

Sara's crying in the bathroom at the bar. I can't even remember how many times I've cried in a bar bathroom. Alcohol has a tendency to make me cry for no good reason. Sara finds the origami rose from Michael. Wyatt enters the bar and asks the bartender about Sara.

We see the data is nearly done copying while Lisa asks Michael if he's ok. Her real guard returns and drags her off.

Back at the bar, the bartender denies seeing Sara. Sara manages to leave without being spotted by Wyatt.

Roland greets the guys enthusiastically when they return to HQ. Michael asks where Sara is.

One of The Company goons is telling Pad Man about the dead guard. Turns out Lisa made her flight.

Michael is talking to Self at HQ. Self tells Michael about his now-dead informant. Self admits he has no idea how to do the breaking-in part of the plan. Self compliments Michael on his style.

The receptionist checks in on T-Bag, who's chilling in his office. I'm so jealous. I wish I had an office like that. He's going through the bird book. He also sees Xing's name in there.

We see two Asian men. One of them is Mr. Xing. Unfortunately, Mr. Xing did not meet up with Mr. Pfeiffer as planned and, therefore, does not have Scylla. Then Mr. Xing gets stabbed. Because these guys don't fuck around. If you don't deliver the goods, you end up dead. The guy who just killed Mr. Xing announces that he's going to LA.

Roland is looking through some of Lisa's personal information, but quickly denies he picked up anything but the card when Linc asks. Oh, Roland. What the hell are you doing? Linc is going to beat you senseless if he finds out you're hiding information.

Linc thanks Bellick for saving him from the guard. Mahone asks Roland for a favor. Mahone tells Roland he wants to find the man who killed his son. Mahone asks Roland to search the FBI database for a man matching Wyatt's description and asks him to keep it secret.

Sara is taking a nice stroll when Michael calls. He wants to know where she is, but she says she's almost home. She says that he's the only thing in her life right now and she wants them to be together. He says they are. Clarissa disagrees. They're sleeping in separate bedrooms. How "together" is that? She hangs up the phone and starts walking back to HQ. We see Wyatt following her.

My grandfather called. He says the bitch (Gretchen) is in trouble. And so are the guys. He thinks it's all complicated. He actually said "gee wiz, it's all complicated with these cards and everything". No, seriously, he said "gee wiz". Too funny. See you all here next week.

Shut Down S04E03

S04E03

• Name: Shut Down
• Air Date: September 8th, 2008
• Season: 4
• Number: 03

Episode Outline

I woke up at 6:30 a.m. this morning to watch the show and write the recap being heading off to work. But my brain absolutely does not function at 6:30 a.m. after 5 hours of sleep due to attending a movie premiere the night before. Normally I'd bitch and whine. But seeing Colin Firth last night, in all his British glory, was totally worth it. By the way, I highly recommend both movies I was fortunate enough to attend at the Toronto Film Festival this year: Ghost Town (hilarious) and Easy Virtue (very droll). Check them out in theatres.

We open with Agent Self fingering a wedding ring which he quickly hides when Michael appears. Michael starts yelling. Someone check my heart rate, because Michael being all aggressive and loud never fails to make me swoon. Michael explains (or, rather, yells) that the data card retrieved in the last episode is only one of six and he assumes that Self knew that fact. He also announces (or, rather, yells) that the team fulfilled their end of the bargain and they have no intention of going after the other five cards. This discussion disintegrates into a shouting match, with Self insisting that the team find the remaining cards otherwise they're going back to jail.

At this point you have to wonder if there's even a point to sticking Michael in any prison. Hasn't be proven that he can simply scheme his way out? Heck, he seems to improve his timing with each break out.

Michael walks off in a huff, agreeing to get the other 5 cards. He returns to HQ, explaining to the rest of the team that they're now in it for the long haul. Alex leaves the room, afraid that the government might shut down their little operation.

Roland enters, happily telling the rest of the team that his little thieving device stole information from the previous cardholder's PDA, including emails and photos. Sara quickly realizes that Cardholder 1 has some secret appointment today. Bellick suggests they push back against Self, but Michael, who is supremely tired of constantly being surrounded by idiots who aren't even half as smart as he is, finally tells Bellick to shut the hell up.

Mahone, meanwhile, calls Lang. AGENT LANG! I love her. He asks her for a favour: she needs to bring something to him in LA. She's hesitant, but he tells her that The Company killed his son and she agrees to help. Lincoln also head Mahone's announcement. Presumably having followed Mahone in order to shout more threats about the two of them will fight to the death when this is all over, Linc instead chooses to leave quietly.

Michael tells Sara that unless they can find the next cardholder by the end of the day, they're all going back to prison. Dum dum dum!

Cut to Chicago, where Wyatt, The Company assassin, has Bruce Bennett tied to a chair, demanding information about Michael and Lincoln. Wyatt injects Bruce with something and then starts rambling about a family picnic. What is the point of this picnic thing? It lasts the rest of the damn episode.

Back in LA, Self is getting chewed out by his DHS Director. Everyone's pissed that Scylla is six cards, not one. Self defends Michael's intelligence and insists that he's up to the job. The Director says that he's going to call Senator Dallo to inquire whether the operation should continue.

Back at HQ, the team is going through the information from Cardholder 1's PDA, trying to figure out some cryptic email messages. Alex and Michael crack the code: there will be a meeting about Scylla today at 4:00, with another cardholder. The team quickly concludes that the location for the meeting was sent in another email, which was not copied to Roland's device. But, a copy is located on a server in Anaheim. Am I the only one who's worried about this? Does that mean that all of our emails are backed up on some server somewhere? Crap. I'm going to have to start using carrier pigeons for security purposes. Sucre and Bellick, meanwhile, are sent to trail Cardholder 1 (Tuxhorn). Michael orders Roland to Anaheim.

T-Bag enters an apartment...a furnished apartment that's running circles around my little condo. While T-Bag's shaving, he's having Scofield flashbacks. Could it be that T-Bag has a mini-crush on Michael and this whole revenge thing is a smokescreen?

Alright, let me summarize the completely pointless storyline involving Bruce Bennett and Wyatt. Wyatt shot up Bruce with sodium pentothal (otherwise known as truth serum). While Bruce is tripping balls Wyatt tries to find out where Michael and Lincoln are. Bruce insists he doesn't know, but finally admits that Sara is in LA. And Wyatt clearly figures out that where Sara leads, Michael will follow. Then he shoots Bruce in the back of the head. Well, we think he does anyways. As with Gretchen, until I see a body with a bleeding wound, I'm not believing that Bruce is dead.

In Anaheim, Sara is pretending to be a temp in order to snatch a security guard's passkey to hand off to Michael and Roland, who use it to break into the server room to copy the email. The security guard, who may very well be the most intelligent bit actor to appear on this show, quickly realizes that Sara stole his card and goes to call the cops.

Meanwhile, Self sees from the GPS ankle monitors, that Lincoln, Mahone and Roland are in Anaheim. Michael explains whey they're there and Self quickly hangs up as his Director comes into his office. The Director has bad news: he and Senator Dallo are shutting down the Scylla operation.

Let me explain something to you: the server room has tons of windows. And not a single freaking person in the office is questioning why two strange men just set up shop in the server room. Outside, Lang calls Alex with the news that she retrieved the information he wanted and he'll have it later that day. Inside, Linc calls Michael with the news that Sara has been stopped by the guard. Michael pulls the fire alarm to cause a distraction and returns to the server room while Sara escapes the building.

Roland confirms that he got a copy of the email when Michael insists that they need to split. But wait! There's a snag. The boys are locked inside the server room and the oxygen is being sucked out.

Global TV informs me that Dominic Purcell saved a baby last year, who was choking on an onion ring. What kind of a parent gives their baby an onion ring?

Michael calls Lincoln, explain the situation. Roland, meanwhile, shows that he is completely useless in case of an emergency, and starts hyperventilating on the floor. Outside, Linc grabs an axe from the fire truck. Miraculous, no one starts screaming because a large, glowering man is striding into the building whilst brandishing an axe. Right.

Michael is unsuccessful in breaking the sever room windows with a chair, but the day is quickly saved by Lincoln. That looks super fun! I want an axe too!

Back in LA, Bellick is trying to convince Sucre that their whole mission will fall apart and maybe they should return to Mexico. Wasn't Bellick bitching not 14 episodes ago about places like Mexico and Panama?

Still in LA, Self is trying to get a phone appointment with Senator Dallo, when another agent comes into the room and announces that it's time to go.

Ha! T-Bag's drinking in the shower. Why in the hell did I never think of that? That's genius! I can't help but be sad when I think of all those wasted hours I spent showering without alcohol, getting ready for a night on the town in law school. I could have been having one heck of a pre-party by drinking in the shower. [Disclaimer: PBMH does not endorse drinking in the shower. In case any of you decide to follow my advice and then slap a lawsuit on us]. T-Bag learns that his new alias is Cole Pfeiffer and he's supposed to work at the Gate Corporation.

Back at HQ, the team goes over the two emails they found. One involves constellations. Mahone goes off on Roland when he makes a remark about everyone who's been killed by The Company, but Linc diffuses him.

Sucre tells Bellick that they need to follow through on their quest to take down The Company because it's the only way to keep his daughter safe and to ensure that he can be in her life. Sucre's touching soliloquy is interrupted by DHS with guns. Sucre manages to send a text message.

Back at HQ, Roland's bitching that his computer is frozen. Roland, do you have a Dell? Or Windows? Cause either of those shitty, shitty products is likely the cause of your computer freezing. I can't even count the number of times I wanted to throw my Dell laptop (or any laptop I've owned with Windows) out the window.

Alas, Microsoft is not the culprit here. Roland quickly deduces that the government is shutting him out of his computer at the same time Michael receives Sucre's text message, telling him to run. Mahone, Michael, Lincoln and Sara pile into the SVU and try to escape. Because Prison Break has two main themes: prison breaking and running. If they can't have prisons, they're gonna fall back on running.

Then there's the car chase, with Self insisting to Michael over the phone that they pull over. Michael doesn't like taking orders and instead tells Lincoln to lose the feds.

On a side note, why is Lincoln always driving? I don't think we've seen Michael drive the both of them in a car since Season 2.

The team ditches the car and Mahone, Michael, Linc and Sara run off, with Self and the other agents in hot pursuit.

T-Bag, back in his apartment that's still making my apartment jealous, calls the Gate Corporation. The receptionist there tracks down the CEO (?) Mr. White and patches him through. Mr. White tells T-Bag (aka Pfeiffer) he's excited to meet him. T-Bag quickly deduces that White has never met Whistler, which means T-Bag might be able to successful pull off this scam to impersonate a salesman (he was hired to be a salesman for Gate). Oh, the comedic possibilities are endless.

The fab four (Michael, Mahone, Sara and Linc), manage to hide in a tunnel, cutting off the single from their ankle monitors, which pisses of Self to no end. Michael experiences another headache, but refuses to tell Sara what's wrong. He spies another piece of paper and quickly figures out the clues in the two emails: the meeting is taking place at a power plant in Newport Beach.

The fab four steals a cab and makes a run to Newport Beach, just as Self gets the signal again and starts to follow.

At the power plant, Tuxhorn meets with Pad Man. Tuxhorn asks Pad Man why they'll be using Laos for an op. The fab four arrives at the power plant and starts to look around. Why didn't we see the shot of them sitting for HOURS in LA traffic? When I was there in January the highway was like a parking lot.

Unfortunately for the fab four, Self and the agents arrive at the power plant. Which means more running. Linc gets plowed down by a car and Sara gives herself up while Michael escapes. Mahone is also caught. Self insists to Linc that the operation is over.

Michael sees Tuxhorn meeting with Pad Man. We also see another car arriving.

Back at the warehouse, we see that everyone from the team has been captured except Michael. Self also tells the agents to let Sara go. Michael returns in the cab and shows Self a video he shot of the Scylla meeting. Turns out all six cardholders were in attendance. Self flashes back to a conversation with his Director. I'm thinking either the Director or Senator Dallo are sketchy. Self allows the team to go free to continue their pursuit of Scylla.

Turns out the Director's name is Herb. The Director tells Self that Senator Dallo won't be there to save him. After Herb leaves, Self stares at a picture of a girl. An ex-wife perhaps?

Mahone retrieves the information Lang got for him. It turns out to be an autopsy report about his son. There's a little tear dripping from my eye. Mahone spent all of Season 2 killing members of the Fox River 8 in order to protect his family and now his son is dead anyways. Linc approaches Mahone and says he knows about his son. Mahone says that only his son was killed. His ex-wife, Pam, is still alive. Lincoln, who finally realizes that he isn't the only person who lost something throughout the course of this show, promises to help Mahone avenge his son.

Ok, I have to send the episode to Cousin Joe since he's working nights this week, so I've got no update from him. And my grandfather hasn't yet watched the tape (yes, the man has a new computer, but still uses a VCR) he made of the show last night. So, there's no word from my family members today. My friend, Geoff, however, says he's disappointed that Michael didn't use some clever plan to escape from the server room. I told him that Michael has been using his brain for months, and he's been thinking so hard that it's clearly giving him a tumor or something and Geoff should just lay off. See you kids here next week.

Breaking and Entering S04E02

S04E02

• Name: Breaking and Entering
• Air Date: September 1st, 2008
• Season: 4
• Number: 02

Episode Outline

We open with Pad Man in an office. He receives a note that says "10,000" and gets a call. Wyatt is on the other end. Pad Man doesn't want to chat with Wyatt, he just wants the brothers and the others dead.

The team arrives in LA and Don wants them to wear GPS ankle bracelets. Lincoln protests that it clashes with his shirt and refuses. Don pulls the whole "I'm in charge" routine and they all put on the monitor.

Don brings the team to a warehouse where they meet Roland, the team hacker. Don instructs the team to find Scylla and Mahone says he knows where they can start.

Michael acts like a gentlemen by offering Sara the houseboat while Linc threatens to beat Mahone to a pulp when they're done making nice. Mahone reveals that Whitey (also known as "The Cardholder") was working with Whistler and that he got a look at Whitey's driver.

In the Mexican desert, T-Bag and his lone companion trying to make their way back to the US. We see that T-Bag is making his way to San Diego, which was written in Whistler's bird book.

Back at the team's HQ Sara is having flashbacks to Gretchen beating her while she was captured. It also looks like Gretchen killed another woman in front of Sara.

Inside warehouse the boys are picking on the new guy, Roland, who's an identity thief. Actually, according to Linc, he's a "douche". Mahone identifies Whitey's driver.

The boys are watching the house of Whitey's driver when he exits and gets into his car. They start to follow him and see him pull up to a house with private security. The boys spot motion sensors, alarm systems and armed guards. Linc tells Michael he better have one hell of a plan. Oh, please, Lincoln. Michael?s already got Plans A through G.

Back at HQ, the team is trying to devise a plan. Ok, so Michael doesn't have a plan. And it looks like he's not the only brains of the operation anymore. Thank God he's still the prettiest. Roland suggests they copy the card and we learn that Whitey is the CEO of some company (his name is Stuart Tuxhorn). Roland reveals that he invented a device that "steals" electronic information situated around it. If they can get close enough, his device will copy the information on Scylla.

Whitey's meeting up with Pad Man and he agrees to some plan that involves 10,000 people. I think these 10,000 people are going to die.

Sucre and Bellick are in a car, while Michael and Linc are in another. Michael calls HQ and we see Mahone, Sara and Roland were left behind. Sucre cuts in front of Whitey's car and causes an accident. Unfortunately, Roland's little device doesn't seem to be getting the data. On to Plan B...

Don meets up with some guy named Jasper. Jasper used to work for The Company. Don tells Jasper he's going after Scylla. Jaspers tries to dissuade him. Don asks Jasper for information about the Scylla decoder box.

T-Bag and his friend are still in the desert. Uh-oh, it looks like T-Bag's friend has decided to turn to cannibalism in order to stay alive. T-Bag manages to kill him while defending himself. And then T-Bag turns to cannibalism in order to survive.

Michael and Lincoln are keeping watch outside Whitey's house. Michael decides to use the housekeeper to get to the card.

Back at HQ, Michael finds Sara on the houseboat. She's reading the poem Lincoln was reading in the previous episode. Turns it it's a passage from The Odyssey. My Homer must be very rusty, since I didn't recognize the passage. It's from a chapter where Odysseus is told he has to fight a monster named Scylla. In order to pass the monster, Odysseus sacrificed six of his men. Wow, I hope that's not a metaphor for what Michael has to do. Sara also agrees to go ahead with the plan tomorrow involving the housekeeper.

Wyatt's in an apartment, sitting next to a bound girl, asking her if Claudia Mauricio is a good roommate. Claudia returns home to see Wyatt and her roommate. Turns out Claudia works for the Department of Corrections. It looks like he's trying to use Claudia to find Michael and Lincoln.

The next day Sara is at a bus stop, standing next to the housekeeper. She starts talking to the housekeeper and they start chatting about handbags. Ah, the universal female small talk topic. The housekeeper stupidly hangs over her bag when Sara asks to admire it.

T-Bag meets up with some bikers in the desert. They offer to take him to San Diego.

Michael and Linc are still staking out the house when the housekeeper arrives. Michael calls the house, pretending to be the alarm company. He asks the housekeeper to check the window alarms for each room in the house. Oh, clever boy. She's going to walk through the entire house with her bag (and the device Sara slipped inside it). Roland's picking up electronic information from the house, but not Scylla. The housekeeper walks into the den and we see that Roland's device is now picking up information from Scylla.

The housekeeper is back at the bus station when Mahone and Bellick do a purse snatch-and-grab. They discover the device isn't in the bag.

Wyatt has a sniper rifle outside a prison in Texas, clearly looking for Michael and Linc. He calls into the office to discover that Bruce posted the brothers' bail.

Back at HQ, the boys are trying to figure out where Roland's device is. They suspect the maid left it in the house, thinking it belonged to Whitey. An argument ensues, but Michael quickly breaks it up by announcing that they're going to break into the house. See? It's the opposite of breaking out. It's like a reversal of Seasons 1 and 3.

At the docks, Michael is asking Don for extra help. Michael grabs his head as if in pain, but insists that he is fine.

At HQ, the team is trying to come up with a plan to get inside the house. Michael is hung up on the quote from The Odyssey "all that avails is flight". He suspects running might be their only option. But Linc insists that Aldo believed The Company should be taken down.

Michael's alone in the warehouse, trying to come up with a plan. See? All he needs is a little time and space and he'll come up with something. The man's a genius, for crying out loud. And it looks like he did come up with a plan because we see the team arrive at Whitey's house.

Sucre and Linc scale the fence while Michael and Mahone wait close by. Linc jimmies open the door, the alarm goes off and the guards start searching the property.

Linc and Sucre bail while Mahone and Michael enter the house from the backyard. Whitey comes down the stairs, trying to see what's going on. We quickly learn that the alarm isn't coming from Whitey's house, but from the house across the street. Whitey disables his own alarm, obviously thinking it was his that was set off. When the alarm is disabled Michael and Mahone enter Whitey's house. Mahone's wearing this black shirt with a really weird collar. It makes him look strange. Like he's a 25 year old metrosexual or something.

Mahone hears a boy's voice and sees a picture of Whitey's young son. He flashes to his own son, Cameron. The boys make a quick getaway.

Wyatt is in Bruce's house. Wyatt asks where Michael and Lincoln are, but Bruce denies knowledge. Wyatt injects Bruce with a needle.

The bikers, meanwhile, drop T-Bag off in San Diego. During the trip he saw Whistler's death in the newspaper. T-Bag notices that the bird book was pointing him to a locker at a bus station. Inside a locker is an envelope from the "Gate Corporation", with a copy of Whistler's ID and a key. We then see that T-Bag is on a bus headed to LA.

Back at HQ, Michael delivers the device to Roland. Roland plugs the device into his computer and appears to be very upset with the information they downloaded from Scylla.

Michael meets Sara out by the water. She gets all mushy and tells him that only the thought of them together kept her alive. Awe. She asks if they can wipe the slate clean and tells Michael he shouldn't feel guilt over what happened to her. Michael cracks a joke and asks if he has to divorce his wife so they can be together.

Linc and Roland approach. Roland explains that they only have a portion of the data. Sara says that according to the quote from The Odyssey, the Scylla information should be with 6 men in total. Meaning they have to track down the other 5 men and their data cards.

And guess what? Gretchen's not dead. Damnit! My grandfather will be so pissed. She's being held captive by Wyatt's associates, who are trying to get information out of her.

Back at HQ Michael appears to be ill. And his nose starts bleeding. Linc enters the bathroom and Michael reassures him that they'll all be OK. Yeah, right.

Now for the calls. My grandfather says it was good. He thinks that T-Bag's in trouble, but he'll rebound. He's also a bit worried about Michael's health. And he IS upset that "the bitch" (aka Gretchen) is still alive. Cousin Joe isn't picking up his phone, but my father says "cool show" (needless to say, I didn't get my propensity for long-windedness from my father).

And we're off! I think the episode was a nice lead-in to the rest of the season. Was it the most brilliant or suspenseful episode of PB ever? Naw. But I'm damn glad we're back. See you all next week for episode 4x03.

Scylla S04E01

• Name: Scylla
• Air Date: September 1st, 2008
• Season: 4
• Number: 01

Episode Outline

Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, how I've missed you! But I despair. I've got no catchphrases for Season 4 of Prison Break. I mean, there's no prison (yo!). There's not even a Panamanian prison (yo!). I'm so off my game here with references to the "A-Team". And, yet, somehow, I know that when I see those familiar characters, when I hear that familiar music, when I see that totally hot Wentworth Miller again, I'll be inspired. Therefore, without further adieu, I give you Prison Break Season 4...well, the recaps, anyway...

Oh man, I haven't been this excited since I lined up at midnight to buy the final Harry Potter (yes, I'm a bit of a nerd). But, Lordy, it's been MONTHS since we last saw a new episode of this show. I just called up my grandfather, shrieking "I'm so excited, I'm so excited" He can't wait to see "the bitch" again (Gretchen) and he warned me that if Sucre dies he's going to do something terrible to the powers that be over at Fox. You Fox guys should worry. He's Sicilian. Draw your own conclusions. Ok, now seriously, onto the recaps...

We open with Michael staring into the mirror. Fortunately, he recaps Season 3 for me. Panamanian prison (yo!) blah, blah, blah, forced to escape by The Company yadda, yadda, yadda, they killed the only woman he's ever loved blah, blah, blah. He's tracked Whistler and Gretchen to LA and now he's out for some good old-fashioned revenge.

Ha! Mahone's a chauffeur. With a hat! Oh my God, it's too much. I can't stop laughing. He's driving Whistler and Gretchen to the racing track in a limo. Gretchen is telling Whistler to get his hands on some sort of "data card". She also whores herself out to Whistler. Way to be subtle, Gretchen. Especially since he doesn't seem to be interested.

Michael, meanwhile, is spying on the trio arriving at the track. Racing tracks are so much fun. I went to a track back in high school with this law firm that I worked with. Looking back on it now, I'm pretty sure I wasn't old enough to gamble and those lawyers should have known better. Someone else happens to notice Gretchen and Whistler's arrival...some weird old guy.

Michael's playing waiter, carrying a box full of champagne. This ruse ends quickly when Michael puts on a suit jacket and pulls out a gun.

Whistler meets up with some no-name men. They want to know who he's buying "it" for. "It" is likely the data card. WHOA! The data card is worth $50 million. Man, I gotta get me one of those. Once the transaction is completed the strange man warns Whistler that "The Company will do anything to get [the data card] back". Whistler rewards the man for his advice by shooting him in the head. He then walks out of the room and Michael follows.

I think Whistler's doing a little double-cross. He stalls Gretchen while he copies the information onto a second data card. His sneakery (is that a word?) is interrupted by Michael and his gun. Gretchen appears and reveals the worst-kept secret in the history of Prison Break: Sara's not dead. Gretchen didn't kill her. Ergo, Sara is ALIVE. Michael demands to know where Sara is but Gretchen refuses to respond until they're outside. Whistler and Gretchen leave as the cops swarm in. We also see that Whistler left the second data card in a newspaper, which is picked up by the same strange man who was watching him as he entered. I'm going to call him Whitey because of his white hair and current lack of name.

Gretchen, who managed to take time out of her busy killing schedule to get a hair cut, meets up with Pad Man in the desert. He insults her leadership and planning style. He yells at her that the data card she retrieved is worthless...a duplicate. Gretchen catches on that Whistler may have double-crossed her. It's also revealed that they broke Whistler out of Sona because he had made initial contact with the man who originally held the data card and they needed him to get the card. Pad Man is too pissed off for Gretchen's excuses and out of the car walks...Wyatt (The Company's assassin). Gretchen starts begging for her life. Man, I didn't think they were going to kill her.

Back in Panama, Lincoln answers his phone. Michael's on the other end. We see that LJ and Sofia are playing "happy family" with Linc. Linc also reveals that Sona burnt down three days earlier and that T-Bag, Bellick and Sucre are all missing. Turns out Michael had no idea Sucre was in Sona. Michael tells Lincoln that Sara might still be alive and asks him about the head in the box. Apparently the explanation is that the garage was dark and LJ never really "saw" them kill Sara. Linc begs Michael to come back, but Michael says goodbye.

In the Arizona desert, a man is driving a truck full of illegal aliens. Among them...Bellick and Sucre! Oh, Sucre, baby! You?re back! Bellick's mom pulls up to save the day and pick up the boys.

Michael's logging onto EuropeanGoldFinch.net...remember that site he used back in Season 2 to keep in touch with the other guys? Someone's posted a message that they have information on Sara and Michael should meet him at the Santa Monica Pier.

You know who Michael meets at the pier? Mahone. In another god-awful hat. Who is the frickin' hat costumer on this show? Mahone says he's happy to see Michael. No, really. Mahone also reveals that he and Whistler are in cahoots against The Company. Michael demands information about Sara and Mahone reveals that Gretchen is dead. Yeah, right. People have a funny habit of coming back on this show. I'll believe that if she doesn't show up again by the end of Season 4.

Mahone explains the data card to Michael, calling it Scylla. It's The Company's "black book", with information on all of their agents. Mahone promises Whistler can provide information on Sara if Michael will meet with him.

The three boys meet. Whistler says that in order to decode Scylla, they need to break into a secured facility. Which means he needs Michael's help. He also reveals that last he heard, Sara was headed to Chicago. Michael wants to throw caution to the wind and reunite with his lady-love, but Whistler insists that they use Scylla to take down The Company and end this running business once and for all. I find this all very ironic considering that Mahone was hunting Michael not two seasons ago. Michael moves to leave when Whistler gets shot in the head. I yell out "Jesus!" while Mahone and Michael make with the running. Meanwhile, Wyatt the assassin takes the Scylla card from Whistler's dead body.

T-Bag?s back! He's with Nun McHoochie from Season 3 and he's got Whistler's bird book. He's got a porn mustache straight out of 1976 and he's going after Michael for revenge.

Wyatt enters a limo with Pad Man, who verifies the authenticity of Scylla. Pad Man then hands Scylla over to Whitey, the man who seemed to be in league with Whistler...you know, when Whistler was still alive. Pad Man orders Wyatt to kill Michael, Mahone and Lincoln.

Mahone calls his ex-wife, Pam. He tells her he hopes they'll still get together.

Back in Panama Lincoln is acting carefree and funny for all of two seconds. Until he spies a suspicious-looking man. He herds Sofia and LJ out of the market. Linc attacks the suspicious-looking guy and the two fight. The fight is ended when Linc kills him and the police approach. LJ and Sofia run off while Linc gets arrested.

Wyatt arrives at Pam's house, looking for Mahone. After some pleasantries, he bursts into her house and grabs her.

In Chicago, Michael calls Bruce Bennett (Governor Tancredi's right-hand man) from a pay phone. He's still wearing the suede jacket from Panama. You would think he could have picked up some new clothes in the last month. Michael asks Bruce about Sara and Bruce agrees to meet Michael. Further conversation is interrupted with the arrival of police officers, who cart Michael off to prison.

Michael is waiting inside of an interrogation room when Agent Don Self, from Homeland Security, enters the room. Don says that Whistler is dead and reveals that he knows about The Company. Ohhh, the plot thickens. Looks like Whistler was working with the Department of Homeland Security (DHS). Don asks Michael to help him retrieve Scylla, otherwise Michael's off to the big house. Michael should scoff. He hasn't met a prison yet that can hold him! Michael offers to help Don in exchange for Don helping him find Sara.

Don also reveals that Linc is back to his old criminal tricks in Panama. He utters what might be the best line of the episode: "The Company tried to take [Linc] out in Panama. He...um...reacted". Don reveals he pulled some strings with the Panamanian police and Linc should be arriving back in the US soon. Don reveals that Michael's father spent the last two years going after Scylla. Michael demands to speak with Lincoln.

Mahone arrives at Pam's house to see it swarmed with cops. He tries to get in but the cops stop him. Oh no, did Wyatt kill Pam and Mahone's son? That makes me sad.

On a brighter note, Sucre's at the hospital, meeting his daughter. She?s so cute! It looks like Maricruz's sister called the cops on him. What a bitch! He runs out to meet Bellick at the car when the cops swarm around them.

T-Bag is pontificating to his compadres about how he and Michael are cut from the same cloth. We see that one of T-Bag's traveling companions has a crowbar. Ah, I think they're going to knock him out to steal his money.

Linc arrives in chains. Don explains why this has to remain a secret operation and promises to provide the boys help. It seems like Sucre, Bellick and Mahone are going to join the team. Don says that they've got to break into The Company's headquarters in LA. Only he doesn't know where the building is. Typical government employee. Do they know anything? Don reveals that he's been chasing The Company for five years and in order to save this operation, he's recruited Michael and Lincoln.

Don walks back in, telling the boys that bail was just posted for them. He gives them Aldo Burrows' file. Michael and Linc soon meet up with Bruce, who had them sprung from jail. He takes them to a house. You know who's in the house? Prepare yourselves...Sara! I know. I'm shocked too.

When we come back from commercial Michael and Sara are making out on a bed. When they come up for air he gives her the origami rose he gave her back in Season 1. Michael tells her about the deal offered by Don.

Linc's having flashbacks of his father's death from Season 2 and is reading a poem from Aldo's file.

Back in the bedroom we see Michael still has his tattoo. He scares Sara, who's off crying by the window. She shows him scars all along her back and insists that it's not Michael's fault. Before Michael can get two minutes into his comforting routine, the window is shot out. Linc bursts in and the three of run out while we see that Wyatt has attempted to shoot at them from outside.

Oh man, I think Michael and Sara were "gettin' busy" She's wearing what appears to be his boxers as the three of them flee the house. Linc and Michael agree to take down The Company and, instead of escaping from the assassin, they decide to call Don to let him know that they're in. Holy crap, how did these morons survive for so long?

The brothers are reunited with Mahone, Bellick and Sucre. Sucre also reveals that T-Bag has Whistler's bird book. We flash to the desert where T-Bag and one of his buddies are bleeding on the ground, having been beaten up by the less trustworthy companions.

Don takes the brothers into another room. He gives them fake IDs and Michael shows Don his tattoo. Don arranges for Michael to have his tattoo removed by laser. Which is apparently a very long and painful process.

The team gathers at a airstrip and gets lectured by Don about the pride they should take in their new jobs. The team gets on an Air Force plane and flies off to LA.